Erratum
Any errors found in my novels after publication will be detailed here.
Kindle Manuscript Updates Incoming Post-Unpublication
These changes will be in, once I re-publish the novels.
Flow improvements to book 2:
- Arc 2's second last chapter has minor streamlining for better flow.
- Arc 3 has some streamlining for better flow.
- Arc 6: The final battle with Tema was streamlined, in terms of some flashbacks, which occluded flow.
- I changed some of the spiritual tenets.
- I also altered one sentence which may be possibly sensitive to some people. I must stress that the purpose of book 2 is to emphasize the importance of love and inclusion while warning of the dangers of what Ken Wilber refers to as the perils of dogmatism (scientific, religious, racial etc.) leading to prejudice, and how to defuse ingrained hatred and negative beliefs, to turn them into love and inclusion instead.
It could just me, since a lot of people said it's a non-issue. I'm just suffering from the post-publication trauma of looking through my novels over and over again (all 4 books word-for-word in the last week) screening for imperfections. As an unhealthy perfectionist with unreasonably high expectations on myself, I'm kind of beating myself up over the slightest imperfection that I have missed. Even though I spotted only 2 typos in 460,000 words, I'm very upset. The same goes for even minor flow issues that others think are fine, but I don't. Everything to me has to meet a list of 60 to 70 professional editorial guidelines to be perfect, with maximal emphasis on flow and balance.
A Master List of All Changes from the ARC (Advance Review Copy) as of 25 Feb 2022
This is very important to my Voracious Readers Only (VRO) Opt-in Readers
Note: Most of the content changes are in book 4.
Book 1:
Front Matter:
Preface and Word to Reader: both updated, streamlined, and improved with better introductions, creating a bond with the reader. Removed technicalities. Reason: The previous one was too technical. People get disconnected from such. It’s more important to bond with people. Also removed all scholastic references and names, as they intimidate, which is not ideal.
Motto after the book cover changed. Reason: I found something shorter and better.
Content Page: Updated with new chapter swaps in book 4, and new backmatter.
Arc 1:
The Eternal Night: first chapter opening lines and paragraphs streamlined. Reason: Some redundancies.
The Eternal Night: Removed that “sweat trickled” sloshing part. Reason: A person should not be able to hear such an occurrence if dragged through a portal. I’m fine with the clothing part though.
Hell on Earth chapter: Added longer, improved resolution.
Book 3:
Arc 1:
Demons and Angels: first chapter opening lines and paragraphs improved. Reason: The original opening lines were too metaphorical. I wanted to avoid purple prose at all costs since I have a tendency to go overboard with openings.
Book 4:
Arc 1:
The Tide before the Deluge chapter’s prose and openings were improved. However, it is now the third, and no longer the first chapter. Reason: I don’t want a first chapter starting off as 3rd person POV … it should be 1st person POV for consistency + the POV of an important character. 3rd person POV is alienating.
Since Zelkova, Burn is the first chapter, the opening hook lines were improved. Reason: Raielas is a super important character and this chapter has so much lore and weight.
Arc 2:
Omen chapter’s POV was renamed the telepathic collective being. Added a few lines to explain they are a collective consciousness. Reason: 1st person POV should be the main POV. 4th person POV is too experimental – I don’t like.
The Flame in the Cosmic Candle chapter’s first half had some line additions to explain + improve the philosophical impact. Reason: The previous one was not strong enough.
The Calm Monkey: Some lines changed to make clearer the idea of Eastern philosophical non-dualism. Reason: Clarity.
Arc 3:
If You Only Knew chapter: Changed to 1st person POV. Reason: Consistency. I hate 3rd person POV for no reason.
Arc 4:
At the Gates of Hell chapter: Qeazor’s flashback from Raielas improved. Reason: The whole Godel incompleteness theorem thing just doesn’t sync well with the setting. Changed it to focus on something more ominous and fits with the tone/setting better.
At the Gates of Hell: Ni’vim’s final choice made clearer with a few line changes. Reason: Previous one was a bit ambiguous.
Ei’lara chapter: One part at the start was jarring and I removed and replaced it with something more interesting that flows better. Reason: Flow matters more.
Ei’lara chapter: The Eternal Reflection resolution and meaning re-written, streamlined, and improved. Added nice poem. Reason: Previous one had some flow issues with minor info-dumping.
Ei’lara chapter: Emphasized and clarified Ni’vim’s choice, as part of book 4’s second resolution. Reason: Clarity + Relevance.
Arc 5:
Requiem and Reconstruction chapters: Changed from 3rd person POV to 1st person. Reason: Consistency. The POV should be 1st person to emphasize Ni’vim’s and Shanyrria’s inner state; 3rd person destroys the sense of intimacy.
The Fallen Zelkova: Decided to add more weight and resolution by revealing <Spoiler’s> identity. Reason: The reason why I held back <Spoiler> was that I thought it would be better to reveal this person in the future. However, after planning volume 2, it’s safe to reveal here.
Appendix:
Intellectual exegesis section added and heavily expanded: Even more content was added. Reason: I hated the previous one, which had all those physical science stuff. Let’s link it back to philosophy, religion, and spirituality instead.
Added social media
Added updated book blurb
Added preliminary book reviews
Updated author info
FAQ updated
My Website:
Novel Details webpage: Improved in a way where it creates a bond with the reader. Suspense improved. Reason: The previous one was too technical and had bad writing. It was “telling” more than “showing” – Yucks!
Main Page: A few refinements here and there. I disliked the Scholastic Synthesis part – I felt it was over-promoting some things which I may not be able to deliver. So I changed it to Thematic Synthesis. Reason: Overpromoting is not ethical, so I’ve corrected that oversight.
Themes and Lessons of Volume 1 improved: Added more things, especially the exegesis.
Book Reviews: Added.
Dated Changes
Of the Advance Review Copy (ARC)
10 Feb 2022 Changes from the ARC (Advanced Review Copy):
Notes to Voracious Readers Only (VRO) Opt-in Readers: Manuscript Update on 10 Feb 2022
This is important to opt-in readers from Voracious Readers Only (VRO), who have downloaded the previous manuscript before around 11 to 12 Feb 2022.
I have updated the CEO of VRO with the latest file, and the new one should be available for access a few days after 10 Feb. It is accessible via a new VRO email update announcement as of 12 Feb 2022.
It is a very minor change, having taken only 3 hours to amend.
Here is a list of changes:
POV Improvements: 2 Chapters in the final arc of book 4 have been changed in terms of their POV from 3rd person POV to mostly Shanyrria’s and Ni’vim’s. The original reason for using 3rd person POV was to create an omniscient perspective since some main characters were disabled, and they were not around to observe the actions of many other characters following the climax in Arc 4. However, I felt this disrupts the flow.
Comprehensibility and Impact Improvements to the Philosophy: 2 chapters in arc 2 of book 4 (the 3rd last and 2nd last chapters of that arc) had some minor tweaks to make it easier to convey my intended points to the reader. Several additional sentences were added to accentuate the emotional impact of these philosophical implications even further.
Minor Flow Improvements: the last 2 climatic chapters of book 4’s arc 4 had just some very minor tweaks where I added a sentence or two here and there to improve the flow of scenes and ideas. The greatest change was adding more lore to Qeazor’s intentions, but most will be revealed over Volumes 2 and 3 in future books. I also pruned 1 minor paragraph as it disrupted the flow.
Note that the final published version will use Kindle Reflowable, which differs from the ePub, Mobi, and PDF files sent to you all. All formatting issues are fixed in the published one, with the book cover directly included inside, rather than being separate.
I am currently thinking of a way to perhaps host a free give-away, so all my VRO opt-in readers can obtain the published Kindle version for free. Need to ask my marketer first.
16 Feb 2022 Pre-release Final Touch-ups from the ARC
Minor improvements
A few additional changes have been made before the very-near release.
Not very significant, but as a perfectionist, they mattered to me.
1) Front and Back-matter Improvements: The preface has been shortened a lot and improved, being made more humanizing, interesting, and connecting. Added changes, book reviews, social media, updated blurb, mailing list sign-up instructions to the backmatter.
2) POV Improvements: Book 1's Paradise Burning chapter was changed to Ni'vim's 1st-person POV for consistency, after the initial scene.
3) Added Content: Book 1's Hell on Earth chapter had an extended scene during the icy cave to augment its character resolution further, before book 2.
4) Quality-of-life Improvements: Just some lines tweaked and added in book 1 to make them better.
5) Flow Improvements: Book 4's Hell on Earth + Ei'lara chapters had some spiritual tenets + images + some paragraphs removed for better flow. Ni'vim's choice with Raielas clarified a little bit more. Qeazor's background in the flashback vastly improved. Book 1's Zelkova Rising chapter has a few mild tweaks to clarify Ni'vim's choice.
I will email Larry, of VRO, my latest file, closer to the release date, in case there are more changes (it's embarrassing to keep sending him too many updates!).
21 Feb 2022 Improvements
More improvements from the Advanced Review Copy (ARC)
I'm annoyed that I sent my ARC to some book reviewers, and still had changes to improve after that:
1) Improved Opening Lines and Paragraphs: Books 1, 3, and 4 had improvements to their openings. I hated Books 3 and 4's former openings.
2) Chapter Improvements: Book 4's first chapter + the Ei'lara chapters have been improved a lot for flow and prose.
3) Better Resolution: Book 4's Ei'lara chapter got improved a bit for much better motives + character & theme resolutions.